I was looking at my last post, and I was laughing, I really was.

It’s not that I wouldn’t like to achieve some of the things that I’ve stated there, and in a way, I have been improving.  It’s just that it’s not the sort of improvement I want (I just end up holing up and reading books for hours on end), and I still feel obliged to talk to many of my friends online.

But that’s not a good thing, it’s not good to be too dependent on anyone, really.  I know that there are some people that I do enjoy talking to online, certainly, just as much if not more than some of the people I know in person.  I should try to distance myself more from my friends online, really great friends are okay with your absence and when you talk to them again, it’s like the absence wasn’t even there. But that’s not the point.. There always should be people there that you can depend on, but everyone should be able to accomplish things by themselves too.

As this article states, the biggest triumph really is getting out of bed.

I’m far too stressed out about school right now, and the pressures within my family regarding university and the like, I have to focus on the smaller triumphs here.

The ultimate goal is to just be happy with who I am and what I’m doing, self control doesn’t necessarily have to be the main thing, it’s just connected to the self control part..  Because if I don’t have enough self control, I end up doing things that I regret.  And then I get mad at myself.